Acharya Mahashraman
Excerpt from his book "Dukh - Mukti Ka Marg"
There are three words in Hindi vocabulary which sound negative, but are the most positive words as far as the meaning is concerned i.e. - Anavesh (Calmness), Anasakti (Detachment) and Anagrah (humbleness). In Hindi grammar, we usually add "An " to get the antonym of the word. In the same way, we add "An " in Aavesh (Anger) to make the word "Anavesh".
Anavesh (Calmness)
The status of calmness is the state of emotional balance in human nature. A person, who gets annoyed atvery silly things, could harm himselftoo, while a person who stays cool in difficult situation, can derive benefits from the incident also. Our fifth Acharya Shri Maghvagani was the saint who lived up to his name. He achieved a higher degree of calmness in his life and "Veetrag" (one who has conquered all his desires); the adjective used for him was so meaningful. Whether he had been criticized or being praised in the union, he used to stay calm underall the situations.
It is desirable for a human being to stay cool in every situation, but sometimes he may lose his control for few moments and start shouting & talking all rubbish. He forgets to whom he is talking to and disrespects everybody irrespective of their age, knowledge and status. Some lose control for a few minutes, but during those few minutes the person becomes horrible and bursts out like anything. Every person should try to stay away from such weaknesses, should control the anger and remain cool in all difficult situations. It's necessary to be rude sometimes for ensuring discipline, but the person should try to speak in a humble manner. It's our failure if we get angry while putting our words forward. Calmness is very important in religious life, but it also plays a significant role in practical life.
Many people live together in a family if they become aggressive, the whole family life gets destroyed. Staying calm in every situation is the most important rule of achieving success in life.
Anasakti (Detachment)
So far we have a body, we can't live without any action; where there is an action, there will always be bonding. It's therefore said that the human being should act with detachment. He can walk, talk, live with the family, do his business; but if he adds detachment with it, he can get enormous success in life. Where there is attachment either with living or non-living beings, the outcome is always sorrow. A very beautiful Rajashtani couplet narrates it nicely:
"je Samdrishti Jeevadha, Karai Kutumab Pratipal
Antar Dil Nyara Ravai, Jyun Dhay ramavai Baal"The nanny, while taking care of a baby is aware that the baby doesn't belong to her. Similarly, a religious person should be aware that although he lives in a family, and it's his duty to nurture his family, but he is eventually a soul, nobody is there for him.
Once an erudite ascetic visited a state. The king himself came to him and requested him to stay at his palace. Accepting his request the saint arrived at the king's palace. The king arranged beautiful and luxurious accommodation and delicious food. The saint lived there, one week passed, but the saint didn't indicate any intention to move from his place. Finallythe king requested the saint to move to another place.
The saint immediately left the palace. The king accompanied the saint on his way to another place. On the way, one curiosity sparked in his mind; the curious king asked the saint;" I was enjoying the luxurious lifestyle in my palace; you too were enjoying the same; so what is the difference between you and me?" The saint peacefully answered, "Come along with me; I will tell you later during my journey." The king continued to walk with the saint. After sometimes the king again asked the saint to address his query. The saint said, "This is the only difference between you and me, only my body stayed at your palace, but your mind always stays at the palace." This is the difference between attachment and detachment. Unnecessary attachment is neither good for spiritual upliftment nor good in the practical life. Thus, the human being should stay away from attachment.
Anagrah (Humbleness)
From the religious point of view where there is perversity, practising truthfulness is not possible; and where there is humbleness, it is always closer to the truth. Generally people should keep themselves free from obstinacy but in some cases being perseverant is desirable.
A saint vows on practising truthfulness, non¬violence, celibacy etc. for his/her entire lifetime. Here, being perseverant is very much desirable to follow the discipline; but during routine activities such persistence/perversity is not desirable.
In a family of four or five, everyone may have different choices of food, but being persistent for the own choice of food may not be good. It won't be possible for the family to have five different choices of food at the same time. Over perseverance in little things is shameful. It spoils the happiness among the family/society members.
The person needs to be flexible enough to keep his/her family happy and maintain the harmony. Thus, a person in order to lead a happy and harmonious life he needs to stay away from perversity.
Conclusion:
The lifestyle which is free from intense emotions, excessive attachment and perversity is the best lifestyle. Such lifestyle fills the man's life with lots of happiness,joyand satisfaction.
STORY
A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they'd be asked the "half empty or half full" question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: "How heavy is the glass of water?" Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed - incapable of doing anything." It's important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down!.