The tree unknowingly knows: "If I want new leaves, I have to give up old ones." Similarly, if you want to feel fresh and make room for the new, let there be a shedding, a fall in every season of your life. Let yourself experience a renewal each day, each moment. Drop away old thoughts like dry leaves and open yourself to new ways of thinking and living. If you want to expand and grow, keep your relationship with the universe continually positive, receptive, expectant.
At the heart of Eastern philosophy is the teaching of detachment. What is this philosophy? It is merely a philosophy of the seasons. It is learning to live in harmony with the seasons. It means this: the things which are relevant to each particular moment in time are relevant to life in that moment, and the things which are not relevant to life in that moment are not relevant. And still you hold on when it is no longer relevant to hold on to and this is called attachment. Liberation from attachment is liberation from pain.
When you are clinging, you don't know whether things are relevant or not. Clinging makes you do one of two things. Either you create tension trying to hold onto a thing or, letting it go, you feel remorse. When it goes, allow it to go. Flow with the seasons.
One who is detached gives up with reverence. Like the leaves, which dance as they give themselves up, you give up with joy. To receive is joy. Everyone likes to receive something new. To give up with the same joy is detachment.
And yet if you don't give up you don't receive. Continuously there is giving and receiving. When you give up with balance, tears don't cloud your vision. When you give up with poise, you don't feel inside pain and regret. When a person leaves you, say "I wish you well." Holding on or regretting, you are losing both the person and your peace. In return you are getting nothing but the results of your negative vibrations.
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To realize what you are, meditate on the philosophy of life, which can help you change your old habits of mind. Say to yourself, "The trees give up. Why do I not?" Watch each thought. Ask yourself, "Is this thought living in the past?" If so, then you know that you are not living in harmony with the season. If you notice that your mind likes to escape into the barn of old memories, say to yourself, "I am going out of the cycle of life because I am living in the past. The past has already given me the result I wanted and still I am clinging to a cancelled check."
By watching you are able to untie yourself. You resolve, "I want to go further." Many good things are waiting for you if you untie yourself from the past. All the springs come from winter. What you call barrenness is to the trees nothing but a period in which they have to wait in expectation. This period is for your renewal.
It is a period of transition, before the coming of spring, before the rebirth of new life. In reality it is a change. Tagore has given us a beautiful analogy. We are like the baby nursing at the breast. When the mother notices that milk has dried up on one side, she moves the baby to the other side. In between, the baby cries. He does not see that in between is the moment of awaiting the new fresh milk. He does not see that there is no real loss.
By watching you are able to see how old habits of thinking disconnect you from your here and now and make you unhappy. Are you projecting the concept of father figure, husband, wife, or other image onto another person? If so, then you do not see that individual as an individual. Are you comparing the present moment with the past? If so, the freshness of life is not enjoyed. You go on missing good feelings, deep communication. And people get bored with you because you always bring out the old imprints of mind, the worn-out things. Then you find someone with the same problem as yours and you wallow together, dragging each other down.