An Ahimsa Crisis: You Decide: Lessons From My Grand-Daughters

Every grandparent, and we are not exceptions, wants to brag about their grandchildren. The following incidents are presented here not as a sign of my ego. These are real incidents from which I learn, and hope to offer as chances for reflection.

We have two granddaughters in Houston, Texas, where we live. Their names are Priyanka (currently aged eighteen) and Divya (currently aged sixteen). From their births, they have been taught about ahimsa as a natural part of their upbringing.

About eleven years ago (when they were only seven and five), my wife and I went to St. Petersburg, Russia and there we bought about a dozen very simple, wooden, mechanical toys for the girls. After our return, we gave all of the toys to our granddaughters. They both took all except one; this one toy they each dropped on the floor and refused to accept it.

I was extremely puzzled. All of the toys were varied; this particular toy had a daddy bear in the front and a baby bear holding a bat in the rear. The toy had a cotton string and when that string was pulled, the baby bear would strike the daddy bear on his back with the bat.

When I asked the girls why they are not accepting this toy, each girl said, “Grandpa, don’t you see there is himsa here?” I was really stunned and said “Wow. Your grandfather was not that smart. Who knows —some day you may become Mahavir.”

The same year, Christmas came and both the girls got lots of gifts from us, from their parents, and also from their maternal grandparents. One of the gifts was a game of darts, a board with arrows. Just to try this new gift, Divya put the dartboard on the wall, grabbed a few of the arrows and prepared to shoot the arrows to strike the so-called bull’s eye (a circle in the center of the dartboard).

Divya took one arrow in her hand and aimed to shoot/throw the arrow to strike the bull’s eye point. At that very moment, in order to encourage Divya, her maternal grandpa said to her, “Divya, go and hit the bull’s eye.”

Now, at this very moment, Divya has the arrow in her hand and is ready to shoot. Suddenly her hand stops and she says, “Why should I hit the bull’s eye?This is himsa.” Then, she said, “Instead of hitting the bull’s eye, can I call it ‘hitting the center point’?” You cannot imagine how elated I felt. She was practicing verbal ahimsa.

A few months later, when Divya was sick with a low-grade fever, she asked me “Grandpa, let us play cards.” I agreed. Divya chose a game meant for small children. This game was called “Go Fish.” Divya looked at me with surprise and said, “I don’t want to go and fish. I want to call it ‘go Schlitterbahn’ [the name of an amusement park in Texas.]”

These are just a few examples of how children if properly trained in a foundation ofahimsa, they can become our own teachers in areas in which we hardly ever paid any attention. This certainly was the case with me. Hearing and watching these two kids gave me joy. If at such a young age, they think about ahimsa so minutely and at such a micro-level, these kids when they grow up will not waver. Unfortunately, daily I see many grown up men and women raised in strict orthodox Jain families but without any logical grounding in ahimsa. As a result, they get blown away from ahimsa at the very first temptation or situation. What we need in the Jain community is the strong and logical teaching of ahimsa at every level.